Dreamer: I am so excited!
Doubter: Not me. I don’t like this at all. It’s far away and could be dangerous.
Dreamer: Nonsense! This is my dream handed to me on a silver platter.
Doubter/Realist (they’re close cousins): Who is going to run your business while you’re away?
Dreamer: My fabulous team whom I completely trust.
Doubter: Well, how’s it going to look to your clients that you are out of the country for three months?
Dreamer: I think it’s going to look pretty good.
Doubter (scoffing): You’re the dreamer. I would naturally look good to you, you silly idiot!
When you are stuck between choices, procrastinating or worrying, chances are your Doubter has taken over. If it is ignored, it can hijack your dreams and turn them into dust. It needs to be dealt with and rendered ineffective. No, there is no blood shed required. It is a process; the process is simple enough.
Imagine that your child comes rushing to you with her something she must have this instant, all breathless with excitement. You are busy with your own deadlines and are rushed too. You don’t pay attention to your child. The child tugs at your arm and repeats her request. You distractedly brush her aside. She tugs harder and raises her voice a couple of notches. Still you don’t give her all you attention but nod distractedly, impatiently.
At this point you are not even aware how big or small her demand is. Perhaps all she wants is a hug; perhaps all she wants is for you to turn your full attention to a drawing she just made of you and her. Maybe she has a thorn in her finger. But you don’t know any of that because you don’t listen to her. That’s when she throws a tantrum. She shouts and raves and stamps her foot. Then, you are compelled to break your bubble of preoccupation and finally give her the attention she was asking for all along.
All you need to do- needed to do- was to pay attention to what your child was saying. Maybe she was just trying to warn you about a big wasp flying your way. Being a child, she couldn’t have known that the wasp wasn’t too dangerous. Her love for you probably blew the danger out of proportion. If you had listened to her right away and laid her fears to rest with quiet, soothing words, she wouldn’t have gone all panicky.
Your Doubter is that child. It doesn’t know how real the danger is. To its active imagination, everything seems life- threatening. It’s concern for your well- being turns the tiniest stomach ache into the most painful trauma you’ve gone through. Turn your full attention towards your Doubter. It’s job is to assist you; it isn’t your enemy.
Once you turn down the volume on the Doubter, it turns into a Realist. The Realist is the part that wants to know where the time and money will come from for your venture. It wants to know what Plan B is. It wants you to be careful so you don’t end up with egg on your face. Listen to it; handle its fears; reassure it and show it that you are well prepared. When it sees it need not worry, it will be quiet.
Your Doubter/ Realist will give you valuable information about the obstacles that you might face. Freedom comes as you appreciate its wisdom and insight rather than judging it as the enemy.
If you never deal with your doubt and you meet another Doubter on the road, their doubt will magnify yours. However, if you have worked with your own doubt, next time a Doubter challenges you, it will merely turn into an opportunity to deepen your commitment and conviction to your dream.
Modest doubt is called the beacon of the wise.
~ William Shakespeare
So true,there are many facets of us that work inside .dreamer we is definitely important to push us ahead but then the doubter we is too equally important.without its cautions ,the restraints we might be like a horse galloping without reins and bridles.
A very accurate example Namita. It’s been long since I saw you here. Good to see you. 🙂
Dagny, your blog should be made a mandatory morning read……………………have I told you lately that I <3 you?
If you did Vini, I have forgotten. In such matters I resemble a gold fish who is famous for its 6 second memory. What was that again? 😀
Go ahead, give me a swollen head, do. I don’t mind…
I don’t know about my blog becoming a mandatory morning read but I wish I had some way of twisting your arm so you’d comment on it every morning. I’d float above ground all day. 😀
Hugs girl… I <3 You
I am in awe of how you convey such complex lessons of life in such a simple manner. Indeed, ones we handle our own doubts, it is a way of deepening your conviction in chasing your dream. You may not realize it but your post absolutely addresses me and the dreams I’ve followed niggled with similar doubts.
Rachna, with no humility and without a trace of modesty, I’d like to thank you. You have no idea of the gift you’ve given me today. To have YOU say, “your post absolutely addresses me” is such an honor. I feel the way I felt when I took a training session for my professors for the first time and they told me that they’ve learned a lot. 😀
:D! Sorry for the typos. *cringes*
Where would we be without typos? Please don’t feel bad… I can’t even see you typos. 😀
Oh yes, I have had multiple instances when they rush in and have to be heard at that very moment especially when you are having an important phone conversation. I have to sheepishly admit that I have shooed them away too.
Oh I’ve done it too! And I’ve done it for things of lesser import that an important phone conversation. I’ve done it simply because I am ‘thinking’. 😛
I can so relate to this post. The way you write, so effortlessly…with such warmth…makes me believe that I can and will deal with my doubtor and realist. So many dreams have been buried…sigh…I know I am the only one who can deal with these and make my own dreams a reality! Thank you so much for the reminder!
You will surely deal with your doubts and make them your ally. You can do be because you are equipped to. I think it is time to take your dreams out from the box you shut them up in. Let them soak in the sunshine. Let them dance again. And talk to me when you wish to. I am here.
Just watched Life of Pi again last night, and this post this morning puts so many things in perspective. Doubt truly is the touchstone of faith, and our attempts to resolve doubt are what makes true determination and commitment come alive. Loved it.
Subhorup, I am elated. Thank you for your visit and the warm words. Happy day! 🙂